First semester of graduate school? Check.

So I successfully survived my first semester as a graduate student. I'm pretty sure I passed all of my classes, so life is good. I'm liking the entire no calculating of GPAs in my program. It certainly takes a certain amount of pressure off.

I am very much looking forward to my winter break, which I guess officially started last night. Before I go back to the land of the malls, I am getting my life back in order, replenishing some of the money that I've spend this holiday season (at I job a love), and see old college buddies that have moved away. I am looking forward to going home though, and seeing my Teaneck friends, being the youngest child yet again (and all that that entails), etc. etc. My home time will last for a shorter time this year than it has in the past. Boston is starting to be my home more and more, so I will be returning to work and to spend time with my Boston friends in early January.

It has been an interesting segue out of undergrad thus far...While things are different than undergrad, they aren't too different. Some friends have moved away while some still remain. I'm living with my freshman (sophomore & junior) year roommate, along with another college friend. Although for the first time I have my own apartment, pet, utility bills to pay, etc. And even though I'm at the same school, things are still different. I spend the majority of my time on campus split between two buildings, so the rest of the campus is beginning to feel a little foreign. As normal, the freshman seem as young as ever. When I met up with one of my old roommates this past week, she remarked that I look older, which is funny, because I don't really feel that much older. I guess as with most things, sometimes its easier to notice change as an outsider.

In the past I have whole-heartedly disagreed with the ideology that "Ignorance is bliss." And overall I still believe that it is better to know than to not know... but for some aspects of my life I've decided that I need to practice ignorance more often. Too much knowledge, I've decided, can be wholly unnecessary and make me feel bad about things that are not worth spending the time or the energy on. Too bad I'm such a curious person. But you know,

"Life's not about what's better than..."

Music is my boyfriend

Thanks to Lifehacker, I've recently come across two great music websites:

Songza, the so called "music search engine and internet jukebox" lets you search by artist or by song, and then lets you listen (free of charge) to whatever comes up. I haven't thoroughly tested the site yet, but it comes up with a decent amount of results for the searches that I've done.

Then there's The Hype Machine which tracks music blog discussions. Specifically, it pulls out posts about music, accompanied by song tracks, and compiles them all in one place. It tends to tap the music blogs that are more centered around indie/non-pop music, so its a good place to find new artists/songs.

In other news, by a random stroke of luck I won two tickets to see the John Butler Trio perform at the Orpheum this past Sunday... and they were absolutely amazing!!! John is one of the most talented guitarists that I've seen in a while. His lyrics and song writing skills are phenomenal as well, and I'm just sad that I've only started listening to him now. I highly recommend listening to some of his music.
(pictures to follow)

Pushing Imaginary Buttons

Wednesday night I had the absolute pleasure of seeing Sia in concert @ the Paradise. For those of you who haven't heard of Sia, she used to be the lead vocalist for Zero 7, an band that Zach Braff used for some soundtracks. One of her singles, "Breathe Me," was also used for the series finale of "Six Feet Under." Anyway, Sia's performance was amazing. Not only is she an amazing songwriter, but she also has a lot talent as a singer and great stage presence. I really enjoyed her set - I think I knew all of the songs except for 2, which is interesting because I really only started listening to her a few weeks ago. Haha, but I think listening to her performance on kcrw.com really got her songs in my head... I think she performed the exact same set list, plus a few other songs. One of the other songs that she performed was "Destiny," which was awesome because it is one of my favorite Zero 7 songs.

So Sia and her band started the set with this great up-tempo, makes-you-wanna-dance song called "Buttons." It addition to the amazingness of the song, all of the performers started off the show wearing these hilarious/creative neon-tape, stick-figure costumes. You really have to see it to appreciate it, so here's a little video from the end of that song. Buttons If you listen closely, I do believe that I am the first person to "wooo!" at the end of the song. I was a little excited, sue me.

Here's a video of her performance of Breath Me. (Also one of my favorites)

*Aside: I'm pretty sure I know who was took these videos, he was standing a little infront and to the left of me*

I hope she comes back to Boston soon :)

From someone with more genius than I

Because my friend's awesome, check out http://www.triggerimages.net/thriller/

I need to be a part of this some year...

For your reading pleasure...

I happened across an article that I thought was interesting. I'm not sure how I feel about everything in this article, but on the whole, I'm with you Tony.

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Friday, October 26, 2007

The Catchy Name is Catching On (by Tony Campolo)

The name "Red Letter Christians" is catching on! Increasingly within the Christian community (and even in the general public), people are becoming aware of the growing number of us who are basically evangelical in our theology but who shy away from designating ourselves as "evangelicals." They know us to be Christians with a high view of scripture, who affirm the doctrines of the Apostles' Creed, and who believe that salvation comes from surrendering our hearts, minds, and souls to the resurrected Christ — but are reluctant to call ourselves evangelicals. They realize that is because the label "evangelical" has come to be almost synonymous with the "Religious Right." While holding to the same theology as evangelicals, we do not want to be known as being anti-gay, anti-environment, pro-war, anti-feminist, and pro-gun — all of which have been pinned on all evangelicals (perhaps unjustly) by the secular media.

There are critics who do not like our name, nor agree with our progressive social agenda. In the October issue of Christianity Today, there was an editorial in which the columnist explained what he thought was wrong with becoming Red Letter Christians. What was interesting in his critique was that he got us right! He grasped what we were all about – and with great effectiveness. First of all, he described us as people who, when we go to the voting booth, ask whether or not a candidate's tax policies serve the interests of the rich to the detriment of the poor, whether or not there should be policies to stop global warming, and if he or she supports Bush's war policies. See what I mean? He understands us perfectly! They are exactly the kind of questions we believe Red Letter Christians should be asking when they vote.

The second criticism leveled at us in that CT editorial was that by calling ourselves Red Letter Christians, we were giving priority to the words of Jesus, suggesting that what he taught makes earlier teachings in scripture secondary, if not inferior. Again, he has us right!

We believe that the Sermon on the Mount presents a morality that is superior to the justice proposed by Moses. But then, Jesus himself said as much. He is the one who said that while Moses allowed for divorce and remarriage that he had a higher law, and that while the retributive justice of the Hebrew Testament proposed "an eye for an eye" and "a tooth for a tooth," that his new commandment was to love our enemies and overcome evil with good.

Surely, the CT columnist does not intend to put the purity codes of Moses, with all of their kosher regulations, on par with the morality of the red letters in the Bible.

I think we're on to something, and it may be soon that those evangelicals who do not want to be lumped together with Religious Right ideologies soon will be adopting this new name. There is a growing number of evangelicals who, when they find out what we're all about, will say, "That's what we think, too!"

Tony Campolo is founder of the Evangelical Association for the Promotion of Education (EAPE) and professor emeritus of sociology at Eastern University.

(from God's Politics - http://blog.beliefnet.com/godspolitics/2007/10/the-catchy-name-is-catching-on.html)

A brief respite

Tonight, for the first time in over a week, I was able to truly take a night off. Sure, I didn't really study much on Friday or Saturday night, but the thought of the impending anatomy exam was hanging over [most] of the first-years' heads. Of course on my night off I end up doing errands/chores, such as laundry and installing a new shower head, etc.

While I hope to do well in grad school, I've definitely reached the point of not caring if I get straight A's or not. My goals are to pass all of my classes (passing being a B-), pass the Boards, and not get too overly stressed out in the process. Are my future employers really going to be looking at my GPA? Of course I want to do well and make myself and my parents/family proud, but I do not feel like it's worth it to freak out about every single exam. Then again, maybe my ideas will change once I get the results back from the three exams that I just took.

These few months have been, and will continue to be, a period of self-discovery and self-defining. I didn't think that grad school was going to be that big of a change, but it's been enough of a change that I think I am redefining myself and figuring out who I am and what I want all over again. This process has been quite invigorating, if not terrifying, but exciting none-the-less. I don't think the core of myself has changed all the much, but rather, what's changing is what I choose to emphasize and how comfortable I am with these things. I do believe I am beginning to talk in circles, so I will end with one of the highlights from the past week.


On May 20th I had the honor of attending Jacob and Heather's wedding, the first wedding of my high school friends. Weird, but if anyone is ready to get married, it's definitely Jacob. What struck me, while I was riding with Nicole to the wedding, is that it felt exactly like high school. Nothing had changed. Sure, we all have college degrees now, and are a few years older, but the essence is still the same. And to a certain extent, I think it will always be that way... we may change, but our friendships will [hopefully] stay the same, always being able to pick up right where we left off. For that, I am thankful.

Help, I have done it again
I have been here many times before
Hurt myself again today
And, the worst part is there's no-one else to blame

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
I've lost myself again and I feel unsafe

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Be my friend
Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

"Breath Me" by Sia

And that's the way things go...

I think this has been one of the most stressful weeks of the semester... even more so than when I had an Anatomy exam, Anatomy practical and Physiology exam within the span of two days. I have a feeling this week of hell is going to last until the end of next week, which sort of puts a damper on things...
It started last weekend, which didn't really feel like a weekend since I spent the majority of my Saturday working the Parents Weekend "Arts Alive!" Festival at Tufts. Then there's this paper/project for my Occupation & Adaptation (O&A) class that's been hanging over my head that's due next Friday. Just trying to get everything done this week that needs to be done was highly stressful, or maybe not highly, but just more than usual.
Next week I have a midterm on Wednesday, Thursday, and then that paper/presentation on Friday... plus an Anatomy exam the following Monday. Funnn times, yes?

Please excuse my b*tch session, it needed to get out in some medium.

I will say that I had a highly entertaining morning. As part of my O&A class we are observing special needs classrooms in different towns/schools. I (and Sam) are observing a medium-functioning classroom in Lexington HS. We have the pleasure (in my opinion) of going to gym class with the kids for the first part of the morning. I think those 40 minutes was some of the most enjoyable time that I've had in a while. The kids are great and play so well together, despite whatever challenges they are facing. The classroom aides are absolutely hilarious, taking each other out... calling inappropriate fouls on Sam... and just acting ridiculous in general. I think I spent at least half of the time laughing (in a good way) at what was going on. It was also fun to play soccer, even if it was in a really laid-back and relaxed way. I think I would enjoy coaching a soccer team of disabled kids... The rest of the classroom time after soccer was good, although Sam and I were definitely fading slightly. I have so much respect for the teacher and the aides with everything that they have to deal with, every day. I imagine that there is a high turn-over rate among special-ed teachers... but who really knows?

Apparently this is not the week for good relationship karma, because it seems like the majority of the people that I've talked to have been having issues. Deeana attributes it to being about a month into school and early relationships ending and what not. Come to think of it, the past two september/octobers have sucked for me, so maybe there is truth to Deeana's hypothesis. Non-platonic relationships are such funny things. (So are platonic relationships for that matter.) I feel like it's very easy for things to be misunderstood and people's feelings to get hurt. I guess that's the nature of the "game" though. I wonder if the entire online-dating scene has exacerbated/changed this cycle. That would be an interesting study. (I also wonder what the divorce rate is among couple who met online, but I think we need to wait a couple of more decades to start running those studies).

To conclude on a somewhat positive note, we had a guest speaker come in for my Clinical Reasoning I class this week. Steve is a professor in the Classics department at Tufts who contracted Guillain-Barree Syndrome about a decade ago. This syndrome basically causes damage to motor neurons, resulting in varying degrees of paralysis. In Steve's case, he was fully paralyzed at the onset of the disease, and now uses a wheelchair and is functionally mobile with his upper extremities. Anyway, what stuck in my mind was how Steve talked about his therapists. During his stay in the hospital/rehab clinic, the majority of his doctors were okay, but it was his therapists and nurses that made the biggest impact on his rehab. It was his therapists that really got to know him and his condition, and really cared about his progress. In regards to his OTs, he said that they were really good at finding creative ways to allow him to get better and to increase his independence. Basically, they allowed him to live again.

This is exactly why I want to be an OT.

Today was another long day at work. During parents weekend we usually hold a 'parents weekend concert' through the music department. This year, it was decided that there would be an entire "Arts Alive" section of the weekend, include multiple performances of many different disciplines across various stages/venues. I was one of the first student staff members to arrive, getting to Tufts at 11:30am, with the festival starting at 2:30p and ending around 7:30/8pm. Despite the overall craziness and how much being on your feet for 8.5 hours is tiring, it was still a pretty good day. Draining, but good. The fact that I enjoy my job so much makes me wonder if I'm doing the right thing by going into OT. Is OT my greatest joy that is also the world's greatest need? I'm not 100% sure, but I think so...

This being my fourth year in events managing, I'm fairly comfortable doing what I'm doing. I've learned how to accommodate to the needs of the performers and audience members as best as possible, while still being a b*tch if need be to get things done. It's a very fine line that you have to walk as an events manager (in my opinion), but it's not that hard once you get the swing of it.

I had a moment of unexpected near-bliss tonight, which was really surprising, but also very pleasing. Now I love music, and music of all kinds, but it is rare for a piece to really grab hold of me and capture my attention to it's fullest. I can remember the first time I vividly had this feeling... it was during a chamber music concert my junior year. I was working the concert when one of the string quartets began to play Beethoven's String Quartet No. 15, Mvt. III. I can remember being in awe of the piece and my heart soaring along with the rises and falls in the music. It was absolutely breathtaking. I'm sure this was not the best that this piece had ever been performed in the history of music, but the feeling was certainly one of remembrance.

I recaptured a bit of this feeling this evening while I was listening to the Orchestra perform the first movement of Beethoven's 1st Symphony. (Oh Beethoven again, I just realized the coincidence... interesting.) I don't know what it is, but music has this magical ability to kindle feelings inside of you that are hard to get elsewhere. I do not believe my words properly convey what I felt, so I think I will use the words of those before me...

"Music washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life."

"Music is what feelings sound like."

"Music is an outburst of the soul."

"Music is the literature of the heart; it commences where speech ends."

I could go on and on, but I think you get the picture...

In Memory...

Today I attended a memorial service for one of my dear friends, David Rawson Jr. David and I sang together for four years at Tufts. I have so many memories of David, I don't even know where to start. I guess the beginning will suffice...

David and I first met in the dining hall during freshman orientation. I was eating with my [now] best friend, and he introduced himself and asked if he could join us. When I told this story to David for the first time he didn't remember our first encounter, but I did. David had a smile and a charm to him that was hard to forget. Then we ended up auditioning for Chamber Singers, and both got in, and thats where our real friendship started.

I really got to know David during our tours to Italy and Spain. In Italy we shared wine and home-made mozzarella, spent too much money on drinks, and watched a brawl start (and end) right by a restaurant we were eating at. In Italy, Diana and I taught David (as well as the other boys) how to meringue and salsa; we sang (without permission) in one of the biggest tourist attractions in Toledo, and bypassed groups of Americans waiting to get into clubs.

I know that all sounds a little frivolous, so I guess I'll just say that David was such an amazing person. Always positive, never spoke negatively about people, intelligent, caring, I really could go on. David's life on this earth ended too early, but his presence will be felt for a long time...

(me, David & Andrew)