Do you ever feel like your existance on earth is pointless? Sometimes I feel that if I don't make a big impact on the world during my lifetime, then I've failed as a human being. Everything I think that I have some talent in has got shot down sometime in my life, and will continue to. Lets review, shall we? People think I'm good at soccer, mainly because I live in Teaneck and the program here isn't that strong. Yes I got into all-state, but some of the best singers in the state don't get into all-state. Its all about who blends. Someone that has a nice voice can get rejected just because they're a bit of a diva. I get decent grades, but don't really excel in any subject. And my faith? wow... I'll just say that I have fallen so far... I know that I can still be saved, but it hasn't reached into the inner depths of my soul yet... and I'm such a hypocrite on top of everything, which I hate because I hate hypocrites. I guess I'm a certified mess. What makes this all pathetic is that I'm one of the luckiest people on the earth. Here I am complaining about how I don't have anything in my life when people 10 minutes away (by car) don't have a place to sleep at tonight or breakfast to eat tomorrow morning. I can basically do whatever I want to, while women half way across the world get stoned for having their face uncovered. Self pity will, no is, my downfall, and I really don't even deserve that. I yearn to lay down my burdens at the foot of the Cross, but there's something inside of me holding me back, and I have yet to discover what that is... As much as I would like to rant and rave about how these feelings are a product of 7th and 8th grade, there is never anyone to blame except for myself. And thats the truth.